Fairy tales are meant to entertain, and little girls believe that some prince will show up and give her all the things she wants because she is beautiful and unique. The real world shows up and we, as women, are faced with the illusion that everything will be good as long as the bills are paid and we pull are weight.
Not to judge but some women believe the stories about Cinderella and wait for men to take over and keep them comfortable. Some give them all the riches in the world and yet they still take it for granted.
Why am I sharing this story? because, my whole life I was taught to never wait for a man to do the things that need to be done and I have done that. Therefore, every time I fail, I fail myself. I fail because I am not strong enough to keep the necessary things I need to provide a good life. I still stand strong in thinking I am cursed with this negative shadow but most people think I am crazy for thinking that.
Let’s look at all that has happened to prove that theory.
Working hard is easy for me and I can look back and see that my strength gave me the tools to build something good but for some reason just when I thought I had it all figured out, shit happens. Either, losing love, or a job or the ability to provide without worry. At 59, I am still struggling and it makes me wonder what all the effort was for. I have proven myself time and time again, knowledge, understanding, compassion for others and yet, I get shit.
Oh yes, self pity sets in all the time but the reality isn’t self pity, it is just a fact. I am not crazy, I am very aware of my tragic life and what happened in 2023 was the worse but it also makes me think more about the path I am on. People have taken advantage of me, more than I like to admit and where are those people today? Enjoying their lives and not even giving me a second thought.
I have one friend, a boyfriend, a son and a cat; that is my life. In the end, it means I need to turn the page, find some purpose again but in the meantime, I must heal my wounds.
I am not Cinderella not am I any of those Disney + characters but I am surely a human being and I need what I need and right now, I need and want more than people think I deserve. Attaining it will be the hardest part because I need the strength to find that glass slipper.
always be unconditional,